Confess

Owen ached for Auburn while he was gone. Trey visited him in jail and told him to stay away from his girl, which upset Owen. He narrates, “The fact that he referred to Auburn as his girl is the last thing I wanted to hear, and that has nothing to do with my jealousy and everything to do with my instincts regarding Trey” (210). He believes she deserves so much better.

Now, he’s in front of Auburn at her door after he watched Trey leave. They hug, and she takes him to her bedroom where they climb into the tent to speak. He asks if she’s with Trey, and she says, “It’s complicated.” When he asks why, she admits it’s the same reason she can’t be with Owen: AJ. Owen says he understands, but he needs her to know that Trey is not a good person. She has to hold onto what works, though; in her mind, Trey is good to AJ, and that’s what matters. They both know this is their goodbye.

He brings Owen-Cat back to his studio and then visits his father, whom Owen hopes has hit rock bottom and gotten help. His father is asleep on the couch, and there’s a bottle of pills nearby. His father became addicted to pills after being in a coma for a month after the accident. Owen felt guilty enough that he kept his father supplied with pills long after the doctors cut him off. Harrison has been his source up until now, but when Owen went to prison, Harrison refused to be a part anymore. Yet somehow, his father managed to get pills again.

Owen pours the pills into his hand to count them, and his father wakes up. Owen tells Cal about Auburn and that she has a son, whom Owen would never treat the way Cal treats Owen. Owen takes the pills and pours them down the sink drain. Cal gets upset, and Owen tells him that seeing how Auburn sacrifices for her child makes him aware of his and Cal’s screwed-up relationship. He says he will no longer enable his father out of guilt and leaves.

Auburn is with Trey and AJ at the grocery store. Trey takes AJ to pick out a toy while Auburn continues to shop. She runs into Owen, and she’s reminded of what true feelings for another feel like. He notes that they’re in aisle 13. AJ and Trey come back, and Trey possessively puts an arm around Auburn’s waist and pulls her away. Trey gives her the silent treatment for the rest of their time in the store; she can feel his anger.

Once AJ is in the car Trey asks Auburn if she spoke to Owen. Then he asks if she “f*cked” him. Auburn gets angry now too and begins to walk away, but Trey grabs her and pushes her against the car. She knows she needs to say whatever will de-escalate the situation, especially with AJ right there, so she says she didn’t. He smiles and kisses her forehead, which Auburn finds scary because his mood changes so quickly. Before she gets into the car, she sees Owen across the parking lot, and they hold their fists to their chests.

Trey leaves for a conference, and Lydia takes AJ to see family. Auburn would have gone with Lydia had she not had to work. Trey is clearly uncomfortable leaving Auburn because of Owen. Auburn goes to Owen’s studio and leaves confessions. She’s left many over the past few weeks, but she knows he can’t tell which are hers. This time she writes a confession that Trey is out of town but immediately regrets it and writes another one that says to ignore the last one. She’s decided she has to stay committed to Trey and work on their relationship for AJ.

Owen shows up at the salon. She feels how much emotion she has for him. He asks if she has time for a haircut. She washes and cuts his hair, and afterward, he places a $50 bill on the counter. She tells him to wait because it’s too much money. He looks at her and walks out. She notices there’s writing on the bill. It says, “I need at least one night with you. Please” (233). She’s emotionally devastated by his confession because she wants it, too.

She goes to his studio, and he pulls her inside. He admits to being selfish and kisses her. She pulls away eventually, breathless, and says she’s with Trey, and he says, “Your commitment is the only part of you that’s with Trey.’ He lifts his hand and presses his palm over my shirt. ‘Every other part of you is with me’” (235). She knows he’s right.

As he undresses her and himself, he reiterates all the ways he knows her and deserves her. He gestures to her heart and says, “And no one else deserves to be inside you if they can’t be there through here first” (239). This is what he means when he says he deserves her. They have sex, and afterward, she’s afraid to say goodbye to him, the same way she was afraid when she had to say goodbye to Adam. She cries, knowing she must, and he holds her, understanding what she’s feeling.

Owen wakes to a confession on the pillow: “I’ll think about last night forever, Owen. Even when I shouldn’t” (243). He misses her already, and it hurts so much. He goes to finish the painting he started of Auburn, using her confessions. Later, he goes to Harrison’s bar, and when he returns his door isn’t locked. Inside, someone has smeared red paint all over his work. He thinks it must be Trey, and he runs to his workroom and sees the painting of Auburn hasn’t been touched, but the confession she left for him today is missing.

Trey knocks on the door. It’s late, and he’s back early. He puts his gear on the counter and goes to use the bathroom. Auburn sees Owen has texted her multiple times. He’s worried about her. She tells him everything is fine, and that Trey is there. He texts back that someone broke into his studio, and that he took her confession.

Trey returns from the bathroom, and they go into her bedroom. He’s being very affectionate and too nice. He tells her he found a house for them to live in, which scares her. Trey gets on top of her and starts kissing and groping her. She doesn’t want it, so she tries to scoot away. She doesn’t say anything, and he takes that to mean it’s okay for him to keep going. She tells him to stop, and he does, but he leaves his hand in her jeans. She tries to pull it out, and he puts his face close to her, full of anger. He names the other men with whom she’s had sex: his brother and Owen. That’s when she becomes terrified. He pushes into her jeans again, and she wonders briefly if she should just let him do it to make things better. She instantly knows she doesn’t want to be spineless because AJ deserves better. She tells him to stop again, but he becomes more aggressive and persistent.

Emory appears at the door and tells him to stop. She has Trey’s gun. She tells him to walk out of the apartment and to the end of the hall, and she’ll leave his stuff outside the door to come back and retrieve. Emory demands he get a move on. After he’s out, he cries and tells Auburn he’s so sorry. Auburn, knowing Owen will be there soon, just needs him to leave, so she tells him she needs some space, and they’ll talk tomorrow.

Owen arrives at Auburn’s apartment and is relieved to see she’s okay. He knows he has to keep her with him to stay safe, so he takes her to a hotel for the night. He asks her to tell him what happens. She does, but she’s clearly ashamed, which hurts him to see. He wants her to report him, but she’s focused on getting Trey to forgive her. She tells him, “You don’t know what it’s like to give up your entire life for someone” (263), and he realizes she doesn’t know that everything he’s done that’s messed up his life has been out of selflessness. He says, “I understand completely that you want to be with your son, but sometimes in order to save a relationship, you have to sacrifice it first” (263). He’s referring to him and her.