Rick

Asexuality refers to a sexual orientation in which someone does not experience sexual attraction. This identity, like many others, is a spectrum. Someone who is gray-asexual (also “gray-A” or “graces”) rarely experience sexual attraction or do so only in specific circumstances, while demisexuals (“demis”) only feel sexual attraction after forming a close emotional bond with another (“Understanding the Asexual Community.” Human Rights Campaign). Lithrosexuals may experience sexual attraction but do not desire reciprocation or the pursuit of a relationship.

There is no singular way to be asexual (often shortened to “ace”) or any other identity on the spectrum. Regardless of orientation, some may still enjoy sex in its myriad forms, sometimes as a compromise with a partner; some may be willing to compromise occasionally but aren’t very interested in it (sex-indifferent); and others may have a visceral/negative reaction to it or otherwise are unwilling/uninterested in participating (sex-averse/sex-repulsed; The Asexual Visibility and Education Network). This is not to be confused with sex-positive, sex-neutral, and/or sex-negative attitudes, which refer to the portrayal/discussion of sex on a wider, more cultural level (e.g., media), rather than a personal one (e.g., individual relationships; The Asexual Visibility and Education Network). Asexuality should also not be confused with celibacy or abstinence, which are behaviors (involuntary or otherwise) and/or choices rather than a sexual orientation. Also, an asexual spectrum orientation does not preclude someone’s body from responding to outside stimuli because arousal does not equal attraction.

Similarly, aromantic people (“aros”) may fall on a similar spectrum, but for romantic attraction: Aros may feel little to no romantic attraction, while gray-aromantic people may only feel it sometimes or in specific circumstances; demiromantic people may only feel it after forming a close bond; and lithromantics may feel attraction but do not desire reciprocation or a romantic relationship. Aromantic spectrum people do want and can form interpersonal connections, but they are uninterested in romantic ones. Some ace and/or aro people desire queerplatonic relationships, which “are not romantic in nature but they involve very close emotional connections that are often deeper or more intense than what is traditionally considered a friendship” (“Asexuality, Attraction, and Romantic Orientation.” LGBTQ Center, University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill). Partners in queerplatonic relationships are called “zucchinis.” Additionally, “squish” is often “used to identify aromantic crushes; the desire for a non-romantic/platonic relationship with another person” (“Asexuality, Attraction, and Romantic Orientation”).

Representation in the media, however, is less celebratory and often either absent or erased. Given this environment, even in the 2020s, Rick’s struggle to understand and accept himself—much less coming out to others—is unsurprising. While Rick is young, as his family constantly comments, he is aware of how he is different from his peers. Jeff, who is the same age and in the same grade as Rick, is already noticing girls, but to Rick, no matter the gender, the idea of sexual or romantic attraction is off-putting. While Rick enjoys Rogue Space (perhaps a reference to Doctor Who and the titular character’s perceived ace and/or aro identity), he does not have the language to express his differences until he joins Rainbow Spectrum. His attempts at researching on his own are stymied by the Internet assumption that all people experience sexual and romantic attraction; it is not until he learns the word “asexual” (and “aromantic”) that he finally finds an identity that fits him.

However, given the erasure and lack of ace/aro spectrum representation in the media, few people outside of Rainbow Spectrum are aware of asexuality, much less understand or accept it. Rick’s sister, Diane, knows about it but dismisses Rick’s identity, citing his youth. Rick’s parents, while open-minded in terms of the “LGBT” part of the LGBTQIAP+ range of identities, do not understand asexuality and cite Rick’s youth as a reason for dismissing his coming out. Grandpa Ray, who enjoys crossdressing cosplay, is the only one to understand and immediately accept Rick when he comes out as questioning aro/ace. Grandpa Ray understands the fluidity of gender and gender performativity, in part because of his connection to Rogue Space and science fiction, both avenues of exploration, self-discovery, and inclusivity. Though members of Rick’s family don’t take him seriously (largely because of his age), he finds support that will allow him to grow into himself; at the same time, Alex Gino elevates an often ignored and erased spectrum of identities that are both vibrant and valid.