Spilled Milk: Based on a True Story

Brooke’s story is one of survival and speaking out against abuse after years of enduring it. The majority of the memoir focuses on Brooke’s resilience and newfound ability to fight back (fueled by education of abuse and a support system), and this manifests in her decision to report her father and bravely testify not once, but twice against him. The court process takes over a year, but she remains calm and determined with the support of maternal figure Gina, counselor Midge, and victim advocate Heather, along with boyfriend-turned-fiancé Jason (who provides a consistent safe space for her). Brooke was told by Midge that after years of abuse, she would one day reach a point where she would become so angry that she’d seek permanent change. When Brooke reaches this point, she never turns back—advocating for herself by finally voicing her trauma and moving out of the family home.

In a symbolic act, Brooke and Gina change David’s name to Earl as per the Dixie Chicks song “Goodbye Earl.” In the song, the titular man is guilty of abusing his wife, but the law does little to stop this abuse. Having reached the point of no return, the wife and her best friend devise a plan to murder Earl and end the abuse once and for all. Although Brooke is not murderous or even vengeful against her father (as she simply wishes to prevent him from hurting others), she identifies with the idea of seeing David as an anonymous abuser who doesn’t deserve his own name or the title of Dad. She sees his 16-year imprisonment as a deserved victory after years of keeping his abuse a secret. In other words, Brooke reclaims her voice by reframing Earl’s abuse on her own terms, acknowledging her own pain as a daughter, while framing Earl as a failure of a father, someone who took advantage of those weaker than him.

During the second trial, Earl is found guilty on all charges and eventually given the maximum prison sentence of 16 years. It is a success not just for Brooke, but the 25 people (and perhaps more) whom Earl abused and who sent victim statements professing their shared request to have him sent away. Brooke “got justice for more than one person” (289) by sharing her story, her preexisting support system being bolstered by the other survivors. On the way home from the second trial, she and Gina play “Goodbye Earl” and celebrate—Earl’s final verdict reinforcing Brooke’s reframing of his abuse as something that happened to her, not something that defines or will forever silence her. Years later, Brooke makes an important speech about her experiences to a group of policymakers, and voices her belief that domestic and sexual violence can be prevented. She continues to speak out against injustice by writing a memoir about her experiences and ultimately believes her suffering made her who she is, someone who wishes to protect others from injustice. She hopes her story can inspire others to share their own trauma and recovery, to help others feel less alone: “After my insight somebody in that room would undoubtedly become someone else’s glass of spilled milk, their only hope, and their one fighting chance” (334).

Brooke’s childhood is dominated by secrets and denial surrounding her family’s abuse by both David and Molly. Chapter 1 opens with a scene that lays the foundation for her life of secrecy: In it, Brooke’s older brother Adam almost drowns in a kiddie pool, and Brooke is told by her father to keep the incident a secret from her mother. This is David’s first secret, and the severity of his secrets increases over time. When Brooke’s father begins grooming and touching her, eventually sexually assaulting her, he gaslights and manipulates her into keeping the abuse a secret, too: “I lifted my head and watched his gaze run over my face. He was waiting for confirmation that the secret we had was still protected, still safe” (70). After his first assault, David tells Brooke that she must have had the flu and vomited in her sleep. Being an adult, the children’s father takes advantage of his authority and vocabulary to normalize his abuse and threaten Brooke into silence. Prior to David’s first assault, Brooke endured his molestation to protect her younger sister Kat from the same treatment, as the sisters were often in the same room.

Brooke’s obligation to keep secrets follows her through childhood and adolescence, as she does so believing she is protecting her siblings. She attempts to use journals to document her thoughts and feelings, but they are always taken and read—an early violation of her privacy. She has no privacy at all, except when it comes to keeping her father’s abuse hidden. At one point, Brooke attempts to end her life with her mother’s medication (which exacerbates Molly’s own abuse of her children), and writes in a suicide note, “Your secret has died with me” (147). The abuse, coupled with the pressure of secrecy, leaves her feeling alone and overwhelmed; while Brooke does not go through with her suicide attempt, these feelings push her to deny her abuse for years. When social services visits her at school, she claims her abuse was a dream, as she fears for her family’s safety if she were to reveal the truth. Throughout her childhood, Brooke gives her mother the benefit of the doubt, believing she must not have noticed her father’s abuse due to her mental health. However, when Molly claims “Now I know why women don’t tell on their husbands, how are they supposed to survive?” (240), Brooke wonders if she was complicit all along. As is often the case in families with financial struggles, Molly may have denied her children’s abuse (and verbally abused them herself) to avoid the financial hardship (or potential guilt) that would follow if she reported David.

During her high school years, Brooke meets people who educate her and provide a safe space to open up about her life. She comes to realize that her secrets are not protecting herself or her siblings at all: “The longer I kept [Dad’s] secrets, the longer he could continue to do whatever he pleased” (164). When Brooke does open up to her loved ones, she realizes that they feel responsible for not noticing the abuse. While painful, the truth liberates Brooke and allows her to truly protect herself moving forward. In the end, she reclaims her voice and succeeds in the trial against her father: “His secret was out, and the jury had believed me” (280).