Stupid Fast

Alone in his room, Felton takes out his pouch of rocks to help him relax, then makes himself put it away. He contemplates a notebook that he meant to use as a diary. He wants to write that he is not the family problem. Felton emails Gus that his mom, brother, and dad have probably made him “nuts,” and that his dad probably was too, possibly made so by Jerri. Gus responds with a rambling email. He mentions using a notebook as a to-do list. Felton remembers going to Gus’s house as a toddler and chasing Gus who had bells on his baby booties. Gus’s father made a comment about Felton “chasing booty” like his dad. Felton remembers there were always parties and his dad’s colleagues were always around when his dad was alive.

Felton writes a list of his goals, which include lifting weights, getting a driver’s license, giving up his dream of becoming a comedian, and refusing to speak to Andrew and Jerri. Felton sleeps the rest of the afternoon, waking only to eat and when Andrew shows him a YouTube video of Aleah’s performance. Felton emails Gus that there is a pretty pianist girl living in his house.

In the present, despite not getting sleep, Felton is wired, unlike the day he just described. He knows that Jerri is not in the house and cannot check on him. He was horribly hot and sweaty but is now getting cooler. He thinks maybe he can sleep, but he is terribly hungry. Felton goes painfully upstairs to the kitchen because he is cut and bruised, worse than the time he crashed his bike. He cheerfully comments that he is “Beat to hell!” (68).

On his paper route, Felton hears Aleah playing piano music from blocks away. Her front door is open. Hypnotized, Felton opens the screen door and sticks his head in to listen. Aleah stops playing and says that Felton listened to her yesterday. Felton fights the impulse to run away and explains this is Gus’s house. Aleah is surprised that Felton can talk: She and Ronald believed Felton had an intellectual disability because he fled and could not speak. Felton explains he is working to fix that image. Aleah says that she and her father are coming to Felton’s house that afternoon. Felton says he will see her later and continues his route. Felton is proud that he managed to speak to a smart, beautiful girl without fleeing. At home, Felton thoughtlessly eats Andrew’s bagel. Andrew is angry, and Jerri calls him selfish. Felton thinks that his family is “nuts.” He encourages himself not to worry about weight training and the jocks that will be there. He emails Gus again about Aleah but gets no response.

Cody drives Felton to weight training. His pickup truck smells faintly of pee, like Cody, but Felton enjoys riding up higher, and thinks Cody is now one of the nicest people he knows. Cody assures Felton he is big, even though Felton feels small. The weight room smells revolting and is filled with “pee-smelling honky jocks and poop-stinking farmer boys, who are football players” whom Felton knows but has not spoken to in years (76).

Coach Johnson thinks that Felton as tailback will make the team unbeatable. Coach measures and weighs Felton, who learns he is six foot one and change—taller than Ken Johnson, who dismissively calls him a “beanpole.” Coach assures Felton that he is big, and if he continues eating and working out, he will put on muscle and have a chance at Division 1 college athletics. Felton worries he is eating so much he is making Jerri poor. Cody tells Felton to be more confident and carry himself like an athlete, then people will stop bullying him. Cody promises to help Felton, but Felton must commit to training and practices. Felton agrees. He keeps up with the others in weightlifting and afterwards dunks a basketball, impressing the guys. At home, Felton notices he smells like pee even after a shower, but thinks it is worth it because his brain was quiet while he lifted weights. He slathers on deodorant as Aleah and her father arrive.

Felton had not planned to interact with Aleah and her father, but after weightlifting he feels large and more confident. He still has no email from Gus, so he taunts Gus with another message about the pretty girl. Felton has never minded sports, or the people who play sports, and used to watch football and basketball when he was little. He thinks he can be a successful athlete. Felton hears Jerri upstairs acting falsely perky, and does not hear Andrew at all, suggesting he is probably acting oddly. Felton decides to show Aleah and Ronald that his family are not all “freaks.”

Felton and Aleah have instant chemistry and stare at each other exclusively. Andrew plays piano; he plays well, and Ronald praises him, but Felton and Aleah do not hear a note. Aleah’s dad and Jerri chat, and Jerri smiles authentically. Andrew plays again, and as Aleah and her father leave, Aleah gives Felton her cell number and assures him she will be playing for him in the morning.

Felton shuts off his light and wants to sleep but he cannot. He thinks about Andrew’s piano recitals. Andrew used to stay up late, practicing and memorizing his songs. Jerri would stay up with him and applaud every time he finished. The noise bothered Felton, who was trying to sleep. He thinks Andrew’s practicing was “crazy,” then comments that he understands. Felton turns his light back on, saying “Go.”

Felton wants to share his feelings about Aleah with Gus, but still has not heard from him. Felton emails Gus that he is now on the football team and in love with the pretty piano girl. Gus replies that he is not allowed to use the computer, his grandma’s apartment stinks, and everyone hates him. Felton does not finish reading Gus’s message. Cody emails Felton a YouTube video featuring Jay Landry, an aggressive football player on a rival team. Cody assures Felton that he will be even better. Dismayed at Landry’s violence, Felton nonetheless thanks Cody, who invites him to grill and watch a football movie later in the week. Felton realizes he possibly has friends and a girlfriend.

Felton has not had a girlfriend before, except maybe Abby Sauter in fifth grade, who walked home with him after school and declared he was her boyfriend. The next year, she shoved pencils down his pants and called him names. The year after, more physically mature, she pushed him against the lockers and breathed Doritos at him. Felton thought that was their breakup. Later, so many people called Felton “gay” he started to think he was. By high school, people called him “Squirrel Nuts,” which he feels suited him because he was twitchy, kept a secret stash of rocks, and ran away from danger. Now, Felton feels like a new person, and dares to think Aleah is his girlfriend.

It’s a pivotal day for Felton. He wakes up sore and thinks Jerri will have to drive him on his paper route, but Jerri is not in her room. Felton searches the house and cannot find Jerri or Andrew. He feels panicky and is reminded of the day his dad died. Felton checks outside and finds Jerri’s car gone and Andrew in the garage. Andrew thinks Jerri left around midnight. Felton is scared because Jerri has always been there. Andrew follows Felton on his paper route. They find Jerri’s car parked in front of Aleah’s house, with Jerri slumped over the steering wheel. Andrew screams, but Mr. Jennings assures him Jerri is okay. Jerri apologizes, tells Felton to finish his route, and takes Andrew home. Felton thinks Aleah must have rejected him over Jerri’s weirdness and is overjoyed when she texts him. Aleah asks him to come over that evening. Felton fearfully goes home.

Andrew is in tears. Jerri drove them home, then promptly vomited and started drinking wine. She insulted Andrew when he tried to play piano to cheer her. Jerri’s father was an alcoholic, and Felton knows that Jerri hates alcohol and does not drink.

Felton finds Jerri with a bottle of wine. She admits she is not okay and observes again that Felton resembles his dad. Jerri tells Felton she has not had a meaningful talk with a man in a long time. Felton offers to help, but she, sobbing, insists it is not his problem. Felton, feeling helpless, goes to his room, realizing retrospectively he should have called his grandma.

Present-day Felton explains that Jerri has no brothers or sisters, her father is dead, and her mother, their Grandma Berba, seemed to hate them all. Steven’s parents and sister are not in contact with Felton’s family. Gus and his family, who would have helped, were in Venezuela. Felton did not know what to do. Felton apologizes, saying Andrew suffered most because he did not call Grandma Berba immediately. It is now 3:21am.