The Things She's Seen

“As my Grandpa Jim had once said to me, Life doesn’t move through time, Bethie. Time moves through life.”

The quote that Beth shares from her grandfather demonstrates the ultimate importance of her family and elders. She uses this quote to explain her belief that the most important way to measure forward progress is through relationships, not through the notations of a ticking clock.

“In fact, when I let myself think too much about the unfairness of it all, I still get mad now. But I couldn’t lose myself to that, not when Dad had been left behind twice over.”

Beth’s is determined to remain strong for her father’s sake and has only remained behind in the world of the living to help him through his grief. However, it is also clear that she is resisting her own spiritual growth by forcing herself herself not to dwell on her own reactions to her death. Her resolution to help Michael reflects The Role of the Community in Healing Grief, but her refusal to dwell on her own status in limbo indicates that she, like Michael, is also on a misguided path and must eventually redirect her energies in a more constructive way.

“Or maybe she was just ignoring us. Well, ignoring Dad. Everyone ignored me, the invisible girl.”

Beth’s characterization of herself as “the invisible girl” conveys the loneliness of her position in limbo as she remains trapped between worlds. As far as she knows at this point in the story, there is no one else like her, and the only person who can interact with her is her father. This assumption on her part will later gain an ironic tinge given that Catching and Sarah have more in common with Beth than she realizes, and they can both see and hear her.

“‘Catching women are fighters,’ Mum says. ‘We’ve had to be, to survive.’”

Catching’s mother explicitly attributes the strength of the Catching women to their willingness to fight for their own survival in an oppressive world that is still reeling from The Impact of Colonialism in Australia. This aspect of Catching’s family history foreshadows the strength that she herself will draw upon in order to survive the ordeal of her abduction. The passage also reinforces the idea that the strength of Aboriginal women allows the Aboriginal people to survive the injustices of colonialism.

“The last thing she did was save me.”

With her death, Catching’s mother joins the lineage of strong Catching women and becomes the final name in the list of ancestors that Catching has memorized and ritually recites. Significantly, the final action of Catching’s mother is one of courage and ensures the survival of the line of Catching women.

“My stomach twists.

I’m a doll.

I’m a prize.

For him.”

The short, sharp statements in Catching’s poetic narrative emphasize her overwhelming feeling of oppression and objectification at the hands of the “Fetchers”, especially when she realizes why they have captured her. She is sophisticated enough to understand their intentions and realizes that they see her as an object for their use and pleasure, not as a human being. The parallelism, short sentences, and strategic line breaks in this passage are designed to emphasize her terror and disgust.

“Shame prickled over my skin. I should have noticed that it was hurting her to tell the story. Dad clearly had.”

Beth’s reaction to Catching’s emotional state acts as a succinct yet forceful characterization of all three people in the scene. Despite Catching’s tough exterior, she is clearly vulnerable and traumatized by her experiences. At the same time, Beth’s reflections demonstrate both her eagerness to solve the mystery and her deep concern for others. This dynamic becomes clear as she first wishes Catching would continue and then belatedly realizes, to her shame, why Catching needs a break. By contrast, Michael’s compassion is strong enough to immediately override his curiosity despite his devotion to justice.

“It didn’t seem right that I could sometimes feel so isolated around my father and yet always so much a part of everything around the rest of my family, when he was the one who could see me.”

Michael’s extreme grief causes him to isolate himself and prevents him from understanding that Beth is more than just the victim of a terrible accident. When she is with him, Beth is cut off from the rest of the family and even from the totality of herself. By contrast, the rest of Beth’s family seeks comfort and healing from one another by laughing together and sharing happy memories of Beth alongside the sad ones. The different feeling that Beth gets from this communal experience demonstrates The Role of the Community in Healing Grief.

“It seems to me he might be a little like my father—the kind of cop who thinks the rules don’t apply to everyone equally.”

Michael’s appraisal of Derek Bell foreshadows the later revelation that Bell is a part of the conspiracy to abduct and assault young women and girls. This passage also links Bell explicitly to the kind of racism against Aboriginal people that Michael observed in his own father. Thus, Michael’s observations tie Bell’s abuse of power to The Impact of Colonialism in Australia.

“But how could I be that butterfly girl when I was only who I’d been, stopped forever at fifteen and a half? Unless I moved on to what was next…Where had that thought come from? Catching was getting into my head!”

In life, Beth always someone lived easily in the moment, never worrying too much about the past. Now, she feels trapped in the past because she has no future in the living world. However, her conversation with Catching has reminded her that there might actually be a future for her in the afterlife. When she works to suppress this thought, her resistance indicates that she is not yet ready to move on, as she equates the desire to do so with disloyalty to her father, who is still grieving her loss.

“Relax, Teller. I won’t tell him I can see you.”

Catching believes that friends always tell one another the truth, and she extends this courtesy to Beth, but not to Michael; her choice indicates that it is only Beth she considers a friend. As a part of her friendship with Beth, she agrees to keep Beth’s secret. Her pointed reference to Beth as “Teller” indicates her respect for Beth, for she uses Beth’s last name just as she prefers people to use her own last name. This choice of diction also draws attention to Beth’s role as a “teller” of truths.

“He eats what’s inside our insides. The colors that live in our spirits.”

Crow’s explanation of the sexual violence that Catching is about to experience is allegorical. The realistic explanation is that the Feed is about to rape Catching, but the horrors of this reality are displaced by a fantastical description of the Feed eating the colors of his victims. Crow’s language in this passage associates bright colors with the inner lives of women and girls; the Feed’s goal in committing these rapes is not primarily physical; instead, he intends to steal the hope and strength of his victims.

“I live

I feel

I hurt.”

The parallel structure of the final three lines of Chapter 12 emphasizes the relationship that binds these three ideas together. To live is to feel, which often means experiencing pain. This connection relates to Crow’s contention that the only way to escape the Feed is to die.

“That fear will wear my face.

Speak with my voice.

And I’ll be terrifying.”

Catching’s determination to turn the tables on the Feed foreshadows the solution to the central mystery. By the end of the novel, Beth and Michael will realize that it is in fact Crow and Catching who have managed to kill the men responsible for the series of abductions and rapes that took place at the children’s home. Catching’s emphasis upon the concept of “speak[ing] with [her] voice” also highlights the importance of Finding a Voice through Storytelling in order to redress past wrongs.

“Yesterday was a different world. Today I did something I’d never done before. I walked away.”

Beth’s certainty that something fundamental has shifted in her understanding of her situation is a testament to the impact that Catching’s comments have had upon her. Before Beth’s conversations with Catching, she only cared about making her father happy. Now, she walks away from him, and this act symbolically foreshadows her eventual decision to leave him and move on into the afterlife, understanding that this transition will be best for both of them.

“Somehow, I knew these colors; more than knew them—loved them and had missed them, although I hadn’t known it until right now. A fierce longing overtook me. I wanted to go home.”

Beth’s epiphany is part of her own internal shift in perspective, for she is no longer conflicted about whether to move on and now wholeheartedly wishes to enter the next stage of her existence and to join the ethereal colors that wait for her to embrace them. Although she has not yet fully freed herself from the world of the living, her musings represent a positive step forward.

“You taught me to be fair, Dad, and what you’re doing’s not fair to anybody.”

Armed with her new philosophical approach, Beth exposes her father to a new way of seeing his own behavior. When she learns why Michael is avoiding the family, she appeals to his sense of fairness and justice in order to urge him to correct his current outlook. This is the first time that she really gets through to him and compels him to understand that he needs to change his approach to dealing with his grief.

“When I was in the beneath-place, it was stories that got me through. Stories that brought me home.”

In this passage, Catching is referring to the stories of her various maternal ancestors, whose lives have inspired her to keep her hope burning and to work toward her own survival. By drawing upon the strength of the women who came before her, Catching finds novel ways to overcome her predicament, and this process supports the life-saving importance of Finding a Voice through Storytelling.

“I’m being carried like a piece of meat.”

Catching uses a visceral simile to describe her helplessness and despair at being treated like an object instead of a human being. At this point in her narrative, she has been paralyzed by a drug that prevents her from taking action to free herself, and she is left to face the realization that her own desires do not matter to her captors.

“You have done this, Isobel-the-Catching! Words have done this. You have made me a not-gray girl.”

Crow’s accusation that Catching is responsible for the return of her colors—and therefore of her feelings—demonstrates the powerful impact that Catching’s courage has had upon Crow’s essence. This event supports the novel’s emphasis on The Role of the Community in Healing Grief, for Crow only undergoes this spiritual breakthrough thanks to Catching’s influence.

“[Choices] measure the distance between who we are and who we’re turning into.

Except it’s the same choice, made again and again.

Choose the opposite of gray.”

Catching explains that she cannot measure time in the underground bunker, but she can measure her progress through the choices that she makes. This sentiment is similar to Beth’s ideas about measuring progress through the choices that she makes with the people in her life but Catching’s version is more focused on the power of hope and renewal than on relationships.

“‘This gray’s yours,’ I say. ‘My colors are mine. I’m not carrying your shame for what you did. Only my pride. For surviving you.’”

In the midst of her imprisonment in the bunker, Catching’s gradual lapse into “grayness” stands as a physical manifestation of her loss of strength and hope. When she escapes and faces her captors, she once again uses the language of color symbolism to emphasize her triumph. She also rejects the final negative emotion—shame—that has been keeping her from fully reclaiming her strength. She now realizes that her attacker is the one responsible for what has happened to her, and she uses her newfound pride in her own survival to rid herself of the lingering sense of shame.

“Of course you’re here at the end. So what? It’s the beginning that hasn’t happened yet.”

Catching’s words to Michael and Beth when she appears near the entrance to the bunker make it clear that she has truly been freed by eliminating her captors and telling her story to Michael and Beth. Her freedom is signaled by her first appearance outside of the hospital, and her diction—“So what?”—emphasizes that although one story has ended, she is ready for a new story to begin.